The Expendables 2

Objectively, with a runtime of under two hours, you just can't give all the characters the space they undoubtedly deserve. Beyond that, it’s a pure action spectacle that works exactly as I wanted it to because it doesn’t underestimate fan intelligence - this is the only way to get the action going, which is secondary because the primary thing is to ride the wave of catchphrases that beat into the mummified icons of most of the people involved. (2012-09-12)

It's not less that a good old classic. A group of retirees travel to digitally modified Bulgaria, alternating game maps that reflect the nostalgic-archetypal touch of the genre, and here and there we have deus ex machina, greeted by a volley of insider jokes. The banality of the plot as well as the parody touch of space and characters add post-modern qualities to it, while Simon West also adds clear personal qualities and a solid tempo. Fortunately, Stallone already understood that some seriousness or "realistic" motivation had no place here - nostalgics wanted their messages and more winks. Blunt warrior macho sentiment still abounds, but this time it's filler between great comedic performances and cutting action with much better timing than in the first film. Although it is again "only" an action encyclopedia, this time it is richly illustrated and has even more bloated references to the mythology of the wheezy grandfathers. I had a great time. (2012-08-27)

After what felt like an eternity of waiting, I finally made it to the theater—and it was absolutely worth it. The Expendables 2 is one of those rare action movies that comes around once in a lifetime... well, now twice, but this time with an even more stacked cast. For any fan of old-school action films, seeing this lineup is pure magic. There are no words to capture the excitement. I haven’t been this hyped for a movie in ages, and it didn’t disappoint. Growing up, I spent Saturday nights glued to action films on TV, which gave me a lifelong love for Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Bruce Willis, and yes, even Chuck Norris! Later on, I became a fan of Stallone, Lundgren, Statham, and Jet Li. Watching all of them together in one film was nothing short of a dream come true. Each character oozes charm, the one-liners are non-stop, and seeing Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger poke fun at themselves was a highlight. The action is top-notch, and the story? Simple, but perfectly fitting for this kind of film. What more could an action fan ask for? Honestly, if you grew up loving these legends, the plot is the last thing you care about. It’s all about the nostalgia, the personalities, and the sheer fun of it all. Some people might not get that (looking at you, critics who think every film needs a deep story), but for me, this was a huge experience. One of my childhood dreams came true, and that counts for a lot. Oh, and Jean-Claude Van Damme absolutely crushed it as the villain. His performance was awesome, and that final fight? Instant classic. (2012-09-19)

I understand the general enthusiasm because seeing all those legends together has a unique feeling. Unfortunately, when I take into account that a film has qualities and attributes other than the cast and the chemistry between the actors (which would exist even if they just looked at each other), it is a failure overall. Simon West seems to have forgotten what a quality action film should be like. I'll overlook the terrible television picture quality (retro and all) and the locations somewhere between Romania and Bulgaria (hello Van Damme and Seagal). If The Expendables had action as good as Con Air had 15 years ago, I would be thrilled, but unfortunately, it’s not even half as good. The editing very confusing, nobody knows who is shooting whom, there are several repeated shots within a few minutes, and woefully confusing fights, except for the last one. I wouldn't expect a purely action film to have its biggest weakness precisely in the action. Stallone is still a cool and the lines and jokes are fine, but I would rather watch three of each guy's best films and not have to look at such a mess. (2012-09-16)

With the passing of a few weeks, I cooled off and took a star off. I really liked the first film better, I expected more room for Arnold Schwarzenegger, some of the lines felt forced, the plot slowed down unexpectedly after the bombastic beginning and Chuck Norris appeared in The Expendables 2 probably mainly to prove to the non-believers that he is real and not imaginary... But the stunning finale gave me absolutely everything I wanted. (2012-10-11)